When I was in San Francisco (did I mention I got to meet Martha Stewart?) I thought it would be a good opportunity to…
cue the scary music
Shop. For. Jeans.
The selection at my local mall is pretty paltry and, besides, I wanted some of those trendy “Skinny Jeans”.
cue maniacal laughter coming from Vogue editors
I figured that somewhere in a SEVEN STORY Macy’s there had to be a perfect pair of skinny jeans, right?
How hard could this be?
I obviously did not understand skinny jeans. In fact, I’m here to confess that I didn’t know what skinny jeans were. I thought they were merely straight legged. You know, like “skinny”.
So, after meeting Martha Stewart, (I did mention that part, didn’t I?), I headed up to the 3rd floor and what followed next was a physical test of endurance the likes of which I’d never experienced within the hallowed halls of a stuffy department store dressing room before in my life.
20 PAIRS OF SKINNY JEANS LATER
- All the fingernails on my right hand were dyed a deep indigo blue.
- I broke one nail.
- One pair was so tight that my butt, in what was probably a desperate 911 call for help, set off the LOUD anti-theft alarm sending the entire PACKED dressing room into high alert while I frantically attempted to peel them off so the saleslady could disable it.
- I understand what the term “Skinny Jeans’ actually means
- I came home with ONE pair of skinny jeans.
Monday, I’m going to tell you exactly how to shop for jeans, skinny or not.
But today I want to know:
What Do You Hate to Shop for?