They Should Have Called it “Juicy Fruit”

by Chloe Jeffreys · 23 comments

in Sex, Love and Marriage, Your Vagina and You

“So how about that vaginal moisturizer review, huh? Where the hell is it, Chloe? You promised us a review of our product if we sent you a 10-day sample, and so far you’ve given us bupkis.“*

All true. As a product-reviewer I suck.

But Hyalo GYN®, the product I was given to review, doesn’t suck.

Except the name.

I’d like to tell the fine people at Hyalo GYN® that they need a different name for their wonderful product because I want to tell people I know in real life about it, but I don’t know how to pronounce the name. I think it’s a big marketing mistake making a product to treat vaginal dryness that women can’t pronounce. Women are already embarrassed enough talking about vaginal dryness without adding in an unpronounceable, chemically-sounding product name.

If only they’d called it “Juicy Fruit.” Now that would have been a good name for a vaginal moisturizer, don’t you think? Everybody can say that. Unfortunately, Juicy Fruit® is already taken, so I guess we’re stuck figuring out how to pronounce Hyalo GYN®. Thankfully, I’ve opted out of making a vlog on Hyalo GYN®, so you don’t have to listen to me attempt to pronounce it.

Vaginal Moisturizer versus Sexual Lubricant

Hyalo GYN® is a vaginal moisturizer, not a sexual lubricant. There’s a big difference, and one every woman of a certain age should understand.

Sexual lubricants, like KY®, Astroglide®, and my favorite silicone variants, like “Wet Platinum®,” are for use during sex. (Just know that you can’t use silicone lubricants while using sex toys that contain silicone. If you do this then your vagina will fuse forever to your sex toy and people will laugh at you behind your back.) While sexual lubricants have their uses, they do nothing to improve the overall state of vaginal health and comfort during non-nooky time. Vaginal moisturizers are something else altogether.

What is Hyalo GYN®?

According to the package insert, “Hyalo GYN® is a clear, colorless gel with strong hydrating properties that contains Hydeal-D®, a hyaluronic acid (HA) naturally present in the vaginal epithelium and other body tissues. Hyalo GYN® was developed especially for women whose vaginal epithelium does not produce sufficient hydration/lubrication and therefore is prone to itching, inflammation, bacterial infections, and painful sexual intercourse.”

How do you use Hyalo GYN®?

Hyalo GYN® comes in a tube accompanied by single-use applicators. You fill your single-use applicator with the prescribed amount of gel and, either lying down or in the well-known tampon-inserting position, insert the applicator into your vagina and plunge.

Overnight, the hydrating properties of Hyalo GYN® work soothing and rehydrating dry vaginal epithelium.  In the morning, and for several days afterwards, your vagina feels plumper and juicier, and isn’t that nice? I’d give Hyalo GYN® two-thumbs up if that didn’t sound both very dirty, and quite uncomfortable.

Hyalo GYN® is non-hormonal meaning it contains no estrogen making it safe for women who cannot use, or are worried about using, hormone replacement therapy (HRT). Their website says that it is “Proven to be effective as estrogen creams!” (Exclamation point theirs)

Currently Hyalo GYN® is offering a FREE 10-Day Free Trial Kit to anyone who’d like to try out their product. You don’t even have to promise to write a review to get it like I had to. Here’s the free shipping code: SAM501

If you are suffering from vaginal dryness it is worth giving Hyalo GYN® a try. Just tell ‘em Chloe sent you. And make sure you use the secret code word. It’s “Juicy Fruit”.

 

*They were actually really nice in their reminder about this review. But nice emails don’t make good blog fodder.

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