Rachel-babyFor those of you who don’t know, one week ago today a five-week old baby boy was placed in my daughter’s arms. And just like that, I became a grandma!

Currently all is forgiven between me and God.

No, I haven’t changed my mind about Him. I still think He runs this planet on a wing and a prayer. But at this point, gazing into this little boy’s beautiful eyes, if a wing and a prayer is what it took to bring him to us, then who am I to argue?

And since I am so quick to complain about God, let me be the first to admit that His timing here has been nothing short of miraculous.

Score One to Team God!

I became a grandmother one year–to the day–almost to the exactly minute–that my daughter and her husband found out that the prospects of biological children were dim. That discovery was devastating to us all, but I was so wrapped up with my marriage, and my impending surgery that I didn’t register how strongly I was impacted by it.

Only later, after my daughter seemed to come to a peace, did I fall completely apart over it.

Life is Unfair

I’m a labor and delivery RN. Here I’ve poured my heart and life into helping women birth babies for the past 20+ years and the only birth I really down-to-my-toes cared to attend would never, ever happen? How unfair is that?

And let’s not forget the part that God isn’t altogether too picky about who He’s handing babies out to today. Notice that you don’t see crackheads lining up for infertility treatments, do you? No. It’s lovely couples with college degrees and good homes that seem to suffer the most from this problem.

While coming to terms with the fact that my own daughter was to be denied biological children, God’s been handing them out like candy to just about everyone else. And I am expected to stand there with a smile on my face, holding the candy dish.

So lately, as some of my readers have noticed, there’s been a lot of wailing and gnashing of teeth on my part about what I perceive as a huge biological injustice.

Can I just take one minute to remind everybody who might judge me for being a bad Christian–and not racing to rejoice in this sad turn of biological fate–that Abraham and Sarah were pretty desperate to have a biological child? So it isn’t exactly as though this desire of mine is unprecedented in Scripture.

But while I was bitching and moaning, my daughter was filling out paperwork, attending classes, and preparing her heart for a baby.

Surprise!

Two weeks ago, with no baby on the horizon, Rachel’s friends threw her a surprise baby shower as a demonstration of their commitment to a baby that they hoped was coming.

When I first heard about this shower I had some reservations. And as the date of the party grew closer I started to worry. A lot.

Would having a house full of baby things, and no baby, encourage my daughter, or break her heart? I just wasn’t sure. I crowd-sourced my closest friends’ and was advised that I should do nothing, and let the party happen without interference.

I still worried.

Timing is Everything

The day before the surprise shower, my daughter and son-in-law received a call from their social worker about a newborn who needed placement. The baby’s social worker wanted to come the very next week to evaluate their  home as a possibility.

That day my daughter and I took a long walk and she talked excitedly about this baby. And she did something she’d not done before; she asked for her bassinet.

The Bassinet

When I was pregnant with Rachel, my mother-in-law made me this beautiful bassinet out of eyelet lace and colored ribbon. It was an extravagance for a newly married, and very poor, couple. For years this bassinet has sat boxed up and waiting for the day a grandbaby would grace it with its presence. And now my daughter wanted it.

My fears about the shower vanished. I knew my daughter was ready to start hoping.

Just maybe I could start hoping again, too.

 

bassinet

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{ 50 comments… read them below or add one }

Molley@A Mother Life April 17, 2013 at 7:48 pm

This is such lovely news. Congratulations Grandma!
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Cheryl Nicholl April 8, 2013 at 7:49 am

What a wonderful story and you tell it so beautifully. I can’t wait to be a grandparent, but in the meantime, I’ll just enjoy my 14 grand nieces and nephews! Whew! Give that baby a kiss from the universe xxxooo
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Lina April 2, 2013 at 6:32 pm

What happy news!! So glad to read to this.

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Chloe Jeffreys April 4, 2013 at 3:27 pm

Thank you, Lina! It’s a very happy time.

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Michele March 28, 2013 at 1:07 pm

Such exciting news! I am so happy for your family. I am a former Sonlighter who reads your blog regularly, but never comments. Looking forward to hearing the rest of the story!

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Chloe Jeffreys March 30, 2013 at 6:49 pm

Thankyou! It’s been an incredible journey though hope, heartbreak, and joy. We’re so happy.

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Maria Redding March 27, 2013 at 5:56 pm

I am so happy for you and all your family! Rachel looks so cute with the baby in her arms!!!

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Chloe Jeffreys April 1, 2013 at 9:05 am

Doesn’t she? It’s so wonderful!
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Brenda March 27, 2013 at 7:00 am

I love that the bassinet was ready for Hope’s arrival. 🙂

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Chloe Jeffreys April 1, 2013 at 9:05 am

I am too. We’re all just so overjoyed. He’s wonderful. Of course, just like when it was my bassinet, her cat is the one who sleeps in the the most.
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Linda D'Ae-Smith March 27, 2013 at 5:31 am

Congratulations to you and your family! It’s obvious this little guy is so loved!
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Chloe Jeffreys April 1, 2013 at 9:04 am

Thank you!
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Shorty March 27, 2013 at 4:55 am

So beautiful!! Very happy for you, PSP (yes, she’s always that to me!) and your entire family!!

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Chloe Jeffreys April 1, 2013 at 9:04 am

Thank you, Shorty. It’s been the most incredibly wonderful time.
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Sharon Greenthal March 26, 2013 at 10:53 pm

Mazel Tov, my friend. What a wonderful blessing in your family’s lives.
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Chloe March 26, 2013 at 11:41 pm

Thank you. It’s the best blessing to hold your grandchild. Words cannot describe it.
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Barbara Feldman March 26, 2013 at 8:57 pm

As my people say, mazel tov! Love this story and the beautiful bassinet.
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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:31 pm

Thank you! It is a joyous time. A new baby is always a blessing. I do think it means that God hasn’t quite finished with us yet.
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Texanna H. March 26, 2013 at 2:05 pm

Congrats to you all! Beautiful bassinet too!! Masel tov!!! 😀

(Throwing this in here because I don’t “talk” to you anywhere else: I was in an accident Saturday, rear ended. Praise God, I’m fine, just a few bumps and bruises….if you saw the car you’d know that’s a miracle. Not even a scratch! Prayers for healing of my aches and for dh’s guilt would be much appreciated….he’d pulled over to render aid, when a girl hit me ’cause she didn’t look up.)

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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:30 pm

Prayers given! I’m so sorry. Thanks for letting me know. I hope you recover quickly. I’m glad the injury wasn’t worse. Thank God!
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Sharon D. March 26, 2013 at 11:05 am

timing IS everything! so very happy for you all!!!!!!!!!!

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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:29 pm

Yes, it is! Sarai laughed at God and I yelled at Him. But the smile on my daughter’s face and the joy in her eyes removed all doubt.
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Ginger Kay March 26, 2013 at 10:21 am

As happy as I am for you, Chloe, my heart is truly rejoicing for Rachel! I am Thrilled that she received a newborn. So quickly, too! Praising and rejoicing and grinning ear to ear at the sweet pix of your girl and your grandson.
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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:28 pm

It is rather miraculous that he came to us as he did and so quickly. I couldn’t be happier.
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Nancy March 26, 2013 at 8:56 am

Chloe, I am so happy for you ! I hope to meet you and hear you talk about this little guy! Maybe at Bloggy Boot Camp in Phx?
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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:28 pm

Thank you!
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TracieO March 26, 2013 at 7:42 am

I have followed your blog for over 2 years without ever commenting but this morning I feel i must…I am so very, very happy for your family! I can’t wait to run into Rachel – probably at the grocery store (yes I am a MS local which is why it’s weird to comment here without feeling like a stalker) and get a peek at her new little bity babe! Congrats Grandma…enjoy every minute of this new adventure. I can’t wait to read more of this story.

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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:27 pm

Hey! I’m always happy when a MS stalker comes out of the closet and comments. Thank you. I’m sure you will see them. She’ll be the baby-wearing mommy with the biggest grin on her face.
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Kristi March 26, 2013 at 6:50 am

I just couldn’t be happier for all of you!!! Huge congratulations!!

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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:26 pm

Thank you!
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Sisters From Another Mister March 26, 2013 at 6:37 am

I do hope that she writes about all of this too, since I remember her to be such a gifted writer … before I knew you were related … which then of course made perfect sense!
Much love to you all, it is all a blessing.
Yes, I too, have railed against God, I sure hope He gets it.
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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:26 pm

I hope she writes, too. Although she laments that she’s awfully busy. She’s not sure how those mommy bloggers have the time.
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Nina Knox March 26, 2013 at 6:36 am

Oh Chloe, How beautiful! I’m so happy for you and your daughter. Being a grandmother is only understood by another grandmother. It changes who you are and your whole outlook on life, to a great degree. It’s the prize in life that we win for being a parent and getting older.
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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:26 pm

Thank you! You are so right. I could never have understood this until I experienced it. Other grandmothers tell you, but you don’t know until it happens.

It reminds me a bit about the time when I had my second child. You worry when you are pregnant with the second child how you are going to share your love. You don’t realize that your heart is going to grow and your love is going to be multiplied, not divided.
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mindy trotta March 26, 2013 at 5:22 am

Congratulations! In a world that sometimes dares us to find goodness and light, all you have to do is look at a baby to know that it still exists.
May he be a blessing to you all.
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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:24 pm

This is so true. He’s so precious. God has not given up on us yet.
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Pat March 26, 2013 at 5:05 am

Congratulations, Chloe, to you and your daughter and her husband,
What a blessing! I struggled carrying a baby to term and know firsthand the anguish women go through longing for a child. My Norwegian grandma was adopted from the Chicago Children’s Home, my French sister-in-law, a single mom, adopted a little girl from an orphanage in Bulgaria, my college roommate adopted 2 boys, and right now my own daughter is working on international adoptions as a pediatrician. Families come in all colors, shapes and nationalities; there is no one size fits all when it comes to motherhood. Love is common denomination!

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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:20 pm

I am learning. I could not love this little guy any more than I do. He has filled my heart with love. I’m so happy.
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Walker Thornton March 26, 2013 at 4:26 am

What a wonderful story. Congratulations to all. I love being a grandmother and I can tell that you’re already in love with this sweet little one.
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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:19 pm

Thank you! He’s adorable. I’m smitten.
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Cathy March 26, 2013 at 3:52 am

Oh! Being a grandma has more that one special meaning for you, it has so many meanings. Thank you for sharing this part of your life with us, Chloe. I LOVE reading about it. I am over the moon with happiness for you and your wonderful family.

Hugs…
Cathy
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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:08 pm

Thank you, Cathy! It is a wonderful time. I’ve always loved spring, but this spring is the best ever. There seems to be new life and hope everywhere I look.
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Sandra March 26, 2013 at 12:16 am

What a beautiful story. I just love it. I’m so happy for you and your whole family. Loving this story.

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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:08 pm

Thank you!
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Stephanie March 25, 2013 at 11:35 pm

Heartfelt congrats to all of you! Love, love the pic of Rachel and her son.

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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:07 pm

Thank you. It is so wonderful to see my own baby so happy again.
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Lois Alter Mark March 25, 2013 at 10:48 pm

Congrats, Chloe! You are going to be an awesome grandma! xo
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Chloe Jeffreys March 26, 2013 at 10:07 pm

Thank you! I’m enthralled.
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Lisa Labon March 25, 2013 at 10:38 pm

So happy for you, Chloe. Congratulations! xo
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Chloe Jeffreys March 25, 2013 at 10:41 pm

Thank you! It is such a happy time.
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