skinny bones 13Jeff and I have recently been boomeranged. Don’t bother looking up the word “boomeranged” in the Urban Dictionary. They have it all wrong. To be boomeranged is when your adult child moves back home.

For us it means that our son wanted and needed to come home to regroup for a season before dashing back out to live the life he’s meant to live.

We’re very happy for him that he was able to find a full-time job–with lots of overtime–within the first four days of being home. Not only is the money good, but he is gone a lot. My only complaint is that his schedule is wonky, and we never really know when he’ll be here and when he won’t.

Having him around, or the imminent threat of having him around, has put a bit of a damper on the wild empty-nest shenanigans that go on here at The Love Shack. My husband says it is just not the same now that I have to wear pants around the house.

This isn’t our first time being boomeranged. Our daughter and her husband moved in with us shortly after they were married while they saved up money to buy their first home. It lasted about six months, and worked out well for everyone. I don’t expect our son to be home very long either. He’s already antsy.

People who warned me that attachment parenting  would result in children who wouldn’t grow up independent were dead wrong. These two kids fearlessly leaped out of the nest as soon as they were able. I was the one who struggled, not them.

Kids and Money

As I said, our son is antsy. He’s lived on his own, supporting himself, since he was 18. He sure likes his independence, and he’s willing to pay for it, and you have to respect that. I totally get it. But still, I wish he would listen once in awhile to anything his father and I have to say.

I’m getting a bit tired of hearing, after the fact, “You were right about that, mom.” Yeah, I know I was right about that, son. Which is why I told you to do it, or not to do it, in the first place.

But this is the child who refuses to accept any second-hand wisdom. He wants to earn all his wisdom for himself. It’s so frustrating sometimes.

I wonder why I ever even bothered getting any wisdom at all since my two kids–the very people who should be the most interested in learning from my wisdom–don’t seem all that anxious to have me share it with them. In fact, there is just a little whiff of condescension about them both. Like I’m now the doddering aunt who you love dearly, but you know isn’t all that bright.

Can someone please explain to me how it is it that you know absolutely everything in your 20s, but by the time you reach 50 you don’t seem to know jack-shit about anything?

So, after reading all of the above, you can only imagine how extremely well a recent conversation about money went between my husband, myself, and our son.  It reminded me just a bit of those old “Your brain on drugs” ads. Only here’s how it looked to me:

kids-and-money

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{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

Christopher James August 3, 2013 at 10:41 pm

that’s good parenting right there. Keep it up!
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Stephanie July 31, 2013 at 9:25 pm

Oh my word, this made me laugh. That whole ‘Kids and Money’ section? Yeah, that is my life. It’s such karmic payback for treating my own Mom like a doddering aunt. I regularly apologize to her these days.

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Chloe Jeffreys July 31, 2013 at 10:15 pm

I spent the last years of my mother’s life apologizing for being so hard on her. I’m not sure it did any good, but I tried.

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Elizabeth Lee July 3, 2013 at 12:21 am

It is a well-known fact that parents turn into blithering idiots starting when the child becomes a teenager. Parents gain tremendous amounts of wisdom over the next few years and by the time the child is 30, he realizes that his parents are brilliant. Since your son has started telling you that you were right occasionally, things are looking up. In just a few more years you’ll be the smartest people he knows.
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Chloe Jeffreys July 3, 2013 at 12:25 am

From your mouth to God’s ear!

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aimee July 2, 2013 at 10:52 am

I’m sure you have lots of good, sound advice about financial matters. Your son will see that someday, too, and once again you’ll hear, “You were right about that, Mom.”

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Chloe Jeffreys July 2, 2013 at 12:45 pm

Heavy. Sigh. Yep.

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Ginger Kay July 2, 2013 at 8:52 am

I’m with you, Chloe. Between my teenager being on school break and my moved-away-at-18 being here to work an UNPAID internship this summer, I am feeling both the lack of privacy and the lack of wisdom. Everybody knows everything except for those of us who are actually paying the mortgage and buying the groceries.
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Chloe Jeffreys July 2, 2013 at 12:45 pm

Isn’t this the truth, Ginger? Why did we bother even living when we’re too stupid to breathe?

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