I know I complain… A LOT…about living here on this isolated mountain, but man, when I come home after a trip to a big city I realize how blessed I truly am.
Especially in the summer.
Driving up the mountain last night on our way home I felt like Hugh Conway in Lost Horizon finally making it back to Shangri-La.
Don’t get me wrong. I had a great time. BlogHer 2012 in New York City was the blast I anticipated it would be. In fact, it was even better than I imagined.
Dare I say it?
Yes. I’m going to say it.
No, really. It was.
First, let me get the bitch slap out of the way and say that there are a lot of self-important, entitled bloggers out there who need to get a freaking grip.
Maybe it comes from being born dirt poor in a housing project in Louisville, but this girl was raised to be a good guest.
And I say BlogHer was a damned good hostess.
If you have a special diet that requires you to only eat food that has never been touched by hands that have come into contact with oxygen, or wheat, or whatever, then I think you ought to be prepared to bring your own damned food.
Before you say that I don’t understand your delicate little princess digestive tract, or how you are so sensitive that you can feel even one little pea under 20 mattresses, I promise you that deep-fried cheese balls and heat-lamped cheeseburgers are NOT my normal fare. You don’t maintain this fabulous 50-year old body by eating crap like that. Trust me. But eat it I did, and grateful for it I was.
Yes, I’m paying for having eaten that crap, but them’s the conference food breaks. Check out the Before-and-After shots of my poor feet showing that I ate way too much salt, and didn’t drink nearly enough water.
If you didn’t like the food, there was a lovely little Duane Reed one block over from the hotel. (Did you know they even have a doctor on-site who will see you for drop-in appointments??!?)
On Friday, in desperate hope that maybe if I ate something good for me I’d be able to poop, I walked myself over there and got some fruit and plain yogurt. It didn’t really solve my pooping problem, but I felt better after eating it just the same.
And as for some reported behavior on the expo floor? We’re bloggers for god’s sake! We don’t do anything truly important. With some notable exceptions, most of us we are writing bullshit on the internet that nobody ever reads. Take the free vibrators and Lysol®, go home, and be happy.
I’m not saying that if there is a product that truly fits your readers that you shouldn’t pursue a relationship with the company. I saw three great products that you would LOVE!! (I’m not even kidding. If these things work like the vendors say they do, trust me, you want to own them.). But that’s not what I’m talking about and you know it. I’m talking about snotty bloggers acting like they are the queen of Blogland. Stop it. It’s rude.
Speaking of vibrators, I’m going to talk about them this week and show you the ones I received as swag. I know you will not want to miss that.
But you know that I don’t attend BlogHer for the swag. I go for the sessions, and the biggest take-away I got from attending sessions this year is that women over 50 are finally getting some notice.
If you are an older blogger who feels like you are nothing but flotsam floating in a sea of mommy bloggers, let me tell you that your time is now!
Last year, it was strongly implied that if I wanted my blog to be successful I should lie about my age. The common wisdom was that nobody would work with or bother reading a woman over 49.
50 is new black, baby.
I attended a truly terrific and encouraging session: Blogging into Midlife.: The Tension Between the Online Spotlight and Offline Invisibility.
Panel Speakers, Darryl Pollack, Lynn Forbes, Ann Dunnewold, and Patricia Patton did an excellent job of addressing the issues of older women in media today and the trouble older bloggers have attracting sponsors. There was great audience participation and I met some wonderful ladies from my tribe.
Then there were the parties.
Last year, women over 45 got nothing special. This year, I attended TWO fantastic events geared specifically for women over 45.
Poise®, who I poked fun at last week, threw an excellent Comedy Revue on Friday night that stupid me left early. In fact, I’m pissed that I left it early to attend an entirely unworthwhile shoe event that was a big waste of my time.
I’m old enough to know better than to chase swag. You don’t make it to 50 without knowing that nothing in life is free.
As God is my witness! I’ll never chase swag again!
I’m honestly tearing up as I write about the new approach Poise® is taking to menopause. Most of us remember the 1st talk we received (or didn’t receive) about getting our periods. But who is here to give us the 2nd talk?
Menopause is shrouded in secrecy and shame for many of us. Getting older is treated like a crime–or a misfortunate accident–that only happens to women who don’t have the good sense to stay young forever.
Poise® has come out with new products that help with some of the more annoying symptoms of menopause, but the greater message from Poise®, that women should not be ashamed of menopause any more than we should be ashamed about any other stage of life, resonates with me as I hope it resonates with you.
Pardon me while I gush a little bit about the serious girl crushes I have on Chris Bradshaw, Audrey van Petegem, Anne-Marie Kovacs, and Susan Keats. Gush and gush. They are terrific ladies. Gush and more gush.
I love that women under 45 were clamoring over on the BlogHer 2012 Facebook Group trying to get invites into this event. Poor them. Too bad. So sad. (hehe)
And sad they should have been. They missed a great party!
I got to ride in a New York City cab through a packed Times Square to get there. And my wholly inappropriate dress was so short that I got to worry that maybe I’d flashed my lady bits to the others waiting on the curb at the Hilton (I didn’t. So sorry to disappoint.)
This event was classy and the sponsors were top notch.
I think eventually advertisers are going to realize that older women have money and time and want to spend both of those things on stuff that makes them happy. It’s time for advertisers to wake the hell up!!!
The BOOMBox Network even had a little surprise for me when I got there. I felt like such a celebrity with my name up in cardboard! There’s no stopping me now!!